Yesterday I had the pleasure (and I say that with all sincerity) of taking my first commercial flight in about three years. I flew to what we often refer to as the “Left Coast” to California and plan to stay for a few weeks. Some call California “Granola Land” because whatever is not fruits or nuts is flakes, but that, like all stereotypes is inaccurate. True, in the ’60s, the days of MacArthur Park and the hippie movement it seemed like the label fit. However, I have found the people here to be as honest, courteous, and friendly as anywhere else where the traveler is not acting like the “Ugly American”. Bravo, California! I hope you realize that you cannot tax yourselves out of your current budget problems.
The reason I write this, however, is to reflect on my journey out here which, of course, was primarily spent in airports and on planes.
I am quite impressed at how the TSA tries to make passage through security efficient. Yes, we had to take off our shoes and separate notebook computers from their bags and all that. I was concerned, however, at how airport security is completely reactive to past events. There is a government regulation that requires us to pass through metal detectors because formerly hijackers tried to take on guns and knives. Government regulations require us to take off our shoes because someone tried to smuggle a bomb in his (and according to the news article, he may not be done yet, but I digress). We have a government regulation that says we can’t bring liquids with us because some bad people took harmful ones on their plane (and so can you – if you don’t mind risking arrest). There are even sniffer machines to try to detect explosives, however, in the airport from which I left nobody was asked to pass through it. I don’t know if it is not fully installed or if they only sniff people randomly. I didn’t ask; I did not want to draw any attention to myself. Apparently there is no government regulation for that. Yet.
Even though there is nothing in airport security that is proactive (we’re always one step or two behind the terrorists), I was grateful that there were no strip searches. I thought that surely since that terrorist had taken a butt bomb past Saudi security, we’d have a new government regulation where we would have to prove that we weren’t packing any C-4 where the “sun don’t shine”. Maybe that’s coming but since the invasive see-through x-ray systems couldn’t detect that, perhaps we’ll just have to settle for overly friendly dogs checking us out or something.
Irony did not stop at the gate. Have you noticed that the FAA requires a safety briefing that includes how to buckle a seat belt before the plane takes off? You are required to buckle your belt before the plane starts moving but did you notice that the briefing on how to buckle the belt is given after the plane has pulled away from the gate? I propose the instructions be changed to read something like, “Before we left the gate, you were required to buckle your seat belt. This is how you did it …” This, of course, begs the question: Does anyone not know how to buckle a seat belt? This, too, shows how government regulation is always in “catch up” mode. Some planes crashed in the long-ago past with people not buckled in so now we have yet another probably outdated government regulation. True, many would not be familiar with where the exits are or how to use a life vest so I’m not down on all safety briefings and the seat belt shtick doesn’t take all that much time. I just find it interesting and indicative of the times in which we live.
So much of this is silliness in the guise of safety and security. Nobody in government wants his or her name to be attached to the act that repeals something and then have the event happen again. That would be politically sub-optimal. Therefore, we live with regulation on top of regulation. There’s no wonder that we have in this country 100,000 laws to enforce 10 Commandments (well, actually only about 5 or 6 of them because many lawmakers don’t care much about the others).












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